I kept hearing that still small voice in my head, “Just go!” I had made every excuse in the book to just stay home. Excuses like, “No one will sleep.”, “There is so much to pack!”, and “My hubby and I will be on full go even more than usual.”
Yet, that small voice repeated, “Just go!”
I knew that all my excuses were rooted in fear and exhaustion, and I knew that it meant I was lacking trust. Ugh! I had been working on letting go, and letting the ease of a beautiful life creep back in. My family wanted to get outside! I was craving adventure as well, but so many hard experiences and grief had drowned out my desire. “What happened to me?” I whispered.
Again, that still small voice tenderly repeated “just go”.
I knew I needed to listen…
Twenty minutes later, I walked into the family room where my bored tribe “slothed” about and I announced…
“We are going on an adventure!” Screams erupted, chants of “mom is great” filled the room, and I smiled from ear to ear. I looked over at my husband and he winked, as if to say, I am proud of you. Heck, I was proud of me! I knew I needed to just go for it. I knew it would not be perfect, but I knew it was good for my kiddos. We needed to practice.
Plans emerged
We found an Air BnB that would fit our budget and sleeping needs, then we found a pet sitter. Things started to fall in to place, and I knew it was meant to be. I became more and more excited.
The day approached… We left early in the morning and headed North. I put a few special things in the seat backs of the kid’s seats. Little dollar store treasures to cushion the ride. The excitement in our party van was palpable!
Over the next 4 days, memories were made. Our sleeping arrangements changed every night to try to find the right formula for sleep. There were arguments, laughter, public meltdowns, and lots of food! It was hard at times yet incredible at times as well. I feared less and accepted more!
They needed to practice
What I realized over those 4 days was that my kiddos needed to practice going on a trip. They needed to lose it a few times. They needed to eat too much junk, and they needed to try to sleep other places. They needed practice. Our fears of it going so wrong had robbed us of practice. It wasn’t supposed to be perfect. It was going to be a bit exhausting and a bit hard. Most of all, we were supposed to live this vacation one moment at a time. Experiencing a moment, then leaving it to venture onto the next.
How did we get here?
I think I just got tired. I was tired of feeling like the only family like ours. Tired of being judged…or worse…someone feeling sorry for us. I was just tired. Yet, I craved adventure with my family. We needed adventure, and I needed to let go. I needed to allow the “hard” on vacation. We all needed practice. We all deserved to grow and experience life’s adventures.
Friends, I know that a simple outing can sometimes be a huge effort in our shoes. I know that you might be tired. Can I just encourage you for a moment…to try again? I know it probably won’t be easy, but I promise it will give you one more reason to celebrate when a moment DOES go well.
Just Go!
Isaiah 40:29
“He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.”
